Friday, April 3, 2009

Go to Hell, Satan.

Ok, I figured it out.

My new TV-movie is going to be freaking unstoppable hotness. It's based on a book I'm going to write one day.

Ok, so quick synopsis, there's this guy, and he's standing on the foot of this really big dais (like steps leading up to a king and his throne.) There's this like cheesey corny metal piano piece playing in the background and we see our hero is pleading to this king who you can't see at the top of the landing. Of the dais. So he's pleading and there are like tears in his eyes and he's got his hands folded and he's asking for something but we can't quite hear.

The throne spins around and we see it's -- gasp! -- Satan!

Satan turns and points disapprovingly. He gets up all big and badass and he's blasting this guy with words.

"Your soul was forfeit in contract, earth creature. It was mine from the day you decided you wanted me to save your family in exchange."
"But then you murdered them!" The man yells, getting angry now.
"HaHaHaa foolish human. What's mine is mine and you are vanquished from me. Your eternal soul is mine and there is nothing you can do."

The man looks down at his open hands. He is at a loss for words.

Satan turns his back on the man, "Leave me mortal, I have no time for you." He sits back in his throne and sits down.

"This isn't fair. I sold my soul to the devil in exchange for their safety and you murdered them. My soul can't be yours."

"I murdered them after i saved their miserable lives," Satan explains, growing bored. "Once they were saved your soul was mine and I was free to do what I pleased. And it pleased me greatly to slaughter them as they cried for help. BaHaaHaHaa!"

The man is at a loss--can only stand there in rage.

"And your wife and child were totally gay" Satan adds.

Something terrible washes over the man. A mask of rage seethes through him. He grits his teeth and his palms close into clenched fists. He glares up at Satan and starts shaking in rage.

Satan gets this look and all of a sudden starts shaking, turning around real quick to look at the man. All the sudden metal music starts kicking in with this badass riff. Satan is looking all around to see where the music is coming from.

All of a sudden a guitar appears in the man's hands and he's the one shredding out the song.

Satan gets up foaming and screaming "I banish you! Away earth creature! You have no power here!"

But the man keeps coming forward slowly, all the while badass licks are flying out of the guitar.

Satan lets out this torcherous scream and jumps to his feet. "It's burning! I'm BURNING!!"

The dude is walking up toward Satan, all the while playing, and then the solo starts.

Satan is holding his head and suddenly burst into flames.

The song goes into this mad frenzied finger tap solo part and Satan is a raging blaze.

"AAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaAAAAGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!" Satan screams into the air, arms flailing.

The dude is right next to him by now and Satan has fallen to his knees in pain. The guy hits this sweet note mid solo and bends it on the guitar like all the way and just holds it while lifting his guitar high in the air over his head.

Satan's head explodes in slow motion and the pieces fly all over the place.

The dude lays down his mighty axe and sits in Satan's throne and a chorus of angels dressed in metal armor appear at the landing of the dais and are all singing sweet vocal harmonies and the piano is playing again and this time there's a sweet 'ending song' type riff playing.

He sits on his throne and turns to the camera and says "Go to hell, Satan." And puts on the crown and the camera pans back and it all gets farther and farther away and fades out.

Now all I have to do is write this badass as shit story!

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