Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Chances Are...

Chances are....
the music I'm listening to is 78,000 x more badass than anything anyone else is listening to.






















Do you think viking metal is a joke?
Just look at their album cover.









Chances are...
my favorite football player left on the Eagles is white.
















Stewart Bradley may look white but he moves so fast and tackles players so hard the jury is still out.









Chances are...
Scott Hartnell's hair is the secret to his strength and overpowers the opposition.

















It may never stop growing. It may never stop flapping in the breeze. We might start having to call him 'Scott Hartnell's Hair' and refer to how little Scott Hartnell it has showing.















Chances are...
I'm going to use stabs and grenades only (no guns) and still get the top overall score in COD4






















Before I work out, I will play Call of Duty 4 and stab, stab, stab, stab everyone in the game while they say things like "that's BULLSHIT!"









Chances are...
I don't know who the Secretary of Defense is, nor what his title entails.























His name is Robert Gates. I've never heard of him before in my life, I've never seen him in my life, and I have no clue if he even has a party affiliation. And I sure as shit know he's an American.










Chances are...
I just got Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas in the mail today and I'll be reading it.

























I ordered it from Amazon.com the other day because it wasn't in the bookstore. Why wouldn't they carry this in the bookstore?










Chances Are...
I won't be shaving for a while after this Sunday.





As soon as the NHL playoffs start the fun is over. It's business time. Business beards are in the house--and where it ends only Lord Stanley and the Flyers can decide.























Chances are...
I would be so unstoppable amounts of badass if I drank from this coffee mug









I typed in the word 'punch' into google image and this came up. I've never seen such a thing. I've never heard of such a thing. And I don't think I can go another day without it.













Chances are...

Mike Richards is CANNON!!!!




[Fact]

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