Thursday, September 10, 2009

Too Good Too Post

Things I've been doing instead of posting stupid, retarded blogs on the even stupider, more retarded internet.

-flying over Russia in a manual (not electric) helicopter
-sharing hash with the pope
-wake-boarding along the schuykill river
-dropkicking a termite
-dividing by zero
-listening to the new porcupine tree CD
-engineering soap that wont burn your eyes
-recording music backwards.
-setting up a trust fund for the clintons
-eating liquid nitrogen
-working on my slapshot
-watching hockey youtube videos
-making love to my girlfriend... from another continent
-chewing bubblicious gum
-listening to celine dieon and crying at night
-getting a 'cole hamels' haircut
-wanting to play more drums
-staring directly into the sun for 6 days... and 3 nights
-writing children's books in human blood
-smoking 4 joints at night and driving a schoolbus full of children
-trying to do fantasy football
-trying not to get arrested
-defeating robots at chess
-smiling at the end of green mile
-thinking about skynet
-smoking cigars and thinking about life
-getting my 'freak' on
-teaching dolphins to fly in reverse
-melting ice cubes with my mind
-watching inglorious basterds last night
-shaking my own hand -- using only my right hand
-laying down the funk

so as you can see, i may never be on the internet to post again.
i'm busy as fuck.

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